After her hit album “I Love You Jesus” in 2017 which contained bangers like “A Jesus Bop,” “Jesus Rises (Easter Song)” and the titular “I Love You Jesus,” camp icon Trisha Paytas announced a major career shift after the 825 citizens of Vatican City campaigned for her to become the next pope. As fans were completely enamored by her gospel album, Paytas announced that she could not disappoint her devout fans via YouTube vlog clickbait “i’m leaving youtube.” and has decided to accept her election as the new Pope of the Catholic Church.
The artist-turned-Pope revealed that she had been devoting herself to the Christian lifestyle for the past few months by re-discovering her copies of the Bible and scriptures from when she was enrolled in an online Catholic school program. After heavily studying and immersing herself in Christian Bible stories, she took the bold step in advancing her career to delete her YouTube channel and converted her Instagram account into a Christian lifestyle vlog series (where she famously becomes vegan for Lent and deletes all of her mukbang videos).
Despite the rules of becoming a pope entailing being a man and being single, fans rallied for her ascendance to the pope by using her lyrics to defend her. Fans cited a verse from “I Love You Jesus,” as proof of Paytas’s innate purity and sacredness. “You can act bad, or you can be good / You can be from privilege, or straight from the hood / But Jesus loves you, this we know / Never leave your side and he’ll lead you home.” In a time of rampant racism and discrimination, especially regarding the Church and its slew of questionable decisions, the verse expresses her promise to stand as a representative for all, rather than some.
Due to popular opinion (and fears of being canceled for misogyny), the church decided to change the rules, making Paytas the first pope who is married, a mother, and mother. With this groundbreaking decision, worldwide support poured in to say that Paytas would lead the movement into a fair and welcoming Catholic Church for all people.
In order to give back to the community that has supported her, Paytas went live on Instagram (@trishapaytasbackup) five days after she accepted the position as Pope and performed blessings on those who were longtime attendees of her Zoom Bible studies. Choosing a random 20 people out of her 1.1M followers, they all joined her on her live to confess their sins and be forgiven.
“I promised my girlfriend I wouldn’t play Valorant without her…but I did…”
To forgive and take the burden of the grave sins of her followers, she doused herself in holy water and sang the lyrics to “Jesus Rises (Easter Song)”: If we trust in God’s promises / We can all have eternal life / Yes, we can live forever through Christ”
During her relocation to the Vatican City, she expresses her gratitude to everyone who has supported her along her journey, worldwide fans, and the royal family who she says has allowed her to become closer to her faith.